Rating: Adult. If you're under eighteen, please go elsewhere now.
Disclaimer: These characters belong to the CW and DC Comics, not to me.
Read Chapter 7 here.
Read the story from the beginning here.
Clark pulls Lex down to the ground, as easily as if he weighed nothing. He's vaguely aware of the other man struggling, striking at him, sobbing in what sounds very like panic, but he doesn't really care much.
The red K is burning inside him, making him hornier than he's ever been. He's never felt like this. Never. Drinking the stuff really is different. It's totally washed away all his inhibitions, transforming him into someone who doesn't care about anything or anyone, as long as he's enjoying himself. He's just like he was after he'd worn the ring for a few months... but magnified.
He lets go of Lex's shoulders and catches Lex's thighs, pushing them wide apart. He has a good grip on Lex, his big hands sinking deeply into Lex's flesh, holding the other man helpless. He'll probably leave bruises behind, but right now he just doesn't care.
"No!" Lex is screaming at him, sounding almost hysterical, and the frantic note in his voice makes the dark, ugly thing inside Clark break all the way out of its cage and prowl through his mind, snarling.
Lex is totally at his mercy, scared half out of his mind, and Clark can do anything he wants to him. Anything.
Lex is just a human, and humans have no power over him.
He bends over Lex, looming over him, and Lex is still screaming, the word no no no over and over again, his eyes wide and wild, as if he's caught in a nightmare he can't wake up from. Clark leans lower, and sees the shimmer of tears in his eyes.
"Scared, Lex?" he taunts.
Lex clenches his eyes shut, concealing the tears, and swallows back his terrified screams. "I'm not afraid," he whispers, sounding like he's fighting to cling to his last tattered shreds of courage. "I'm not afraid of you. I'm not afraid of anyone."
"But you are." Clark catches Lex's face in his hand and tilts it up, exposing the fragile skin of his throat. "You definitely are, Lex. You're afraid of me. You're afraid of meteor freaks. And you were scared to death of the fire."
"I almost..." Lex's voice wobbles. "I almost burned to death, Clark."
Clark looks at his lips trembling, and the dark thing inside him gathers itself to spring. It wants to tear, to rend, to devour everything in its path. "It's more than that," he says, very softly. "You've been in a fire before, Lex. The time that woman tied you to a chair and set fire to the floor."
Lex shivers a little. "I still don't know what happened then. I don't know how I survived it."
"I saved you," Clark says with a shrug. "Just like I saved you this time. You're mine, Lex. You've always been mine. I won't let anything or anyone hurt you."
"Then don't do this." Lex opens his eyes and looks at him, a desperate plea in his gray eyes. "Please, Clark. Don't."
"Quit whining about it," Clark says, unconcerned. "You liked being pushed around earlier. You liked being tied to the bed. And you liked it the time I came to your office and pushed you around."
"That was different. You weren't... you were you, Clark. You weren't this... whatever you are now. Right now, you're a..."
His voice trails off, as if he can't find words to describe how horrific Clark is. Clark feels anger swell inside him, and he bares his teeth.
"Freak?" he suggests softly. "Monster?"
Lex clenches his eyes shut again and doesn't answer, and his obvious fear makes Clark angrier than before.
"Whatever I am right now, Lex, it's your fault. You made me this way with your little wine cocktail. You wanted me out of control, remember? You wanted to see how far I'd go. This is all your fault, Lex, and you damn well deserve anything you get, and then some."
"Please." Lex draws in a quavering breath. "Please, Clark. Just let me go."
"I don't think so." Clark pushes his head back further, and then he's licking Lex's throat, kissing it, biting it, and Lex gives a muffled yelp. When Clark lifts his head, he sees a slow trickle running down Lex's neck, dark against the pale flesh. He licks his lips, tasting the coppery flavor of Lex's blood.
"Pain, Lex," he whispers tauntingly. "You get off on pain. Want some more?"
Lex's eyes are squeezed shut, but as Clark glares at him, he sees a tear slide from beneath one of the closed eyelids and trickle down Lex's cheek, the same way his blood is trickling down his throat.
That single tear cools his rage like a deluge of rain pouring onto a fire. Lex's blood, and Lex's tears, are both reminders of how terribly vulnerable Lex is, how easily he can be hurt.
Clark blinks, shaking his head. All the violent emotions swirling within him begin to calm, and suddenly he feels very odd, very uncomfortable.
He feels... ashamed of himself.
Lex is scared out of his mind, and he's tormenting him. Tormenting a man he supposedly loves. Deliberately frightening him. Deliberately hurting him.
He looks at the trickle of blood, and the tear glinting in the starlight, and dismay fills him.
"Lex," he says softly, reaching up and wiping the tear off Lex's cheek. "Don't cry."
"I see..." Lex's voice shakes, and he swallows, obviously trying to steady it. "I see the cocktail is wearing off."
Maybe it is, because sanity certainly seems to be returning to him somehow. Clark isn't sure if his rapid metabolism has finally processed the red K, or if maybe the little taste of Lex's blood neutralized it somehow. He remembers Chloe telling him a long, long time ago that Lex had been affected by the meteor shower. It made him bald, but it also cured his asthma and raised his white blood count to an extreme level. Chloe had thought maybe it gave him some sort of mild self-healing abilities.
Maybe Lex's blood neutralized the red K somehow. Or maybe it's just a coincidence. Clark isn't sure. All he knows is that his terrible sexual need has faded to a dull throb, and that his anger has died away, leaving him filled with a deep remorse.
He sits up, his ass bare in the grass, and pulls Lex into his lap. Lex drops his head against Clark's shoulder, and Clark hears an audible sniffle.
"I'm sorry I scared you," he whispers humbly.
"I just..." Lex turns his face into Clark's shoulder and mumbles. "Flashback, I guess. When I was fifteen, at Excelsior... these guys..."
Anger flares in Clark. He doesn't know if it's red K anger, or just the ordinary kind. "Ollie?" he says, very softly. Oliver Queen is his friend, but he knows Ollie and Lex have some sort of history. They've never liked each other much, and if this is the reason, well...
But to his relief, Lex shakes his head. "No. A bunch of guys I hardly knew. Other kids always picked on me..."
Clark nods, stroking Lex's shoulder reassuringly. He knew that. Lex had been a target for bullies, thanks to his baldness. Kids were always hard on anyone different. Clark understands that as well as anyone.
"Anyway." Lex's voice is still shaking, but he goes on doggedly. "It was late at night, and I was outside on the grounds, taking a walk. It was dark. So dark. All of a sudden... all of a sudden they came out of nowhere, and got me down on the ground, and they... they..."
"I get the picture, Lex." His hand strokes Lex's shoulder, in a gentle, comforting caress. " Take it easy."
"No. You don't. I told you, you were the first one I ever let..." Lex's voice is quavering badly now. "What they did to me-- it's not what you're thinking, not quite. They held me down, and they beat the hell out of me with sticks. And then they used the sticks to..." His voice breaks. "It hurt, Clark."
Suddenly Lex's refusal to ever be the bottom makes a lot more sense. Clark can hardly imagine how traumatic that night must have been.
No wonder pain is all mixed up with sex inside Lex's head. His tendency to push other men around, to always need be the one in charge, to play mind games to ensure he's always in control, makes a lot more sense, too.
And the fact that for Clark, he's willing to be the bottom, suddenly takes on an even greater meaning.
"I'm sorry," he says, very softly, his fingers stroking Lex's bald head. "That must have been horrible."
"It hurt," Lex whispers again. "And it scared the hell out of me. It was so dark..."
That's the second time he's said that, and Clark realizes that it's the dark that triggered Lex's panic tonight. The fire scared him, just as it would scare anyone, but it was being held down outside in the dark that had really sent him into hysterics. Clark's held down Lex before, even tied him to the bed, without precipitating that kind of fearful response.
But being attacked outside in the dark was obviously just too much for Lex to cope with.
Lex goes on, in stammering, halting sentences. "I tried to get away, but one of them-- he was from Smallville, and he was some kind of freak, and he knocked me down and kept me on the ground with this forcefield he could generate..."
"Okay." Clark speaks softly, because Lex's voice is lifting, rising into high-pitched hysteria. "Easy, Lex. It's over now. They won't hurt you. Neither will I."
"That's not true." Lex is speaking in frantic, staccato bursts of words. "Don't you understand, Clark? You... you can hurt people. Other freaks can hurt people. You all have these powers... more power than anyone should have... and no normal person can stop you..."
"Lex..." Clark sighs. "I don't go around hurting people. Not unless someone slips me red meteor rock, anyway."
"And how do you know someone won't?" Lex lifts his head and stares at him. His eyes are wild. "That was what I wanted to know, Clark. How far you could be made to go. I had to know. And I found out a hell of a lot, didn't I? If the cocktail hadn't worn off, you would have raped me, and we both know it."
Clark lowers his gaze, unable to deny the truth of Lex's words.
"Ordinary people act out of character on drugs, too," he says instead, quietly.
"Yes, but ordinary people aren't anywhere near as strong as you, Clark. When you're out of control, no one can stand against you." He stares at Clark challengingly. "And earlier...you told me you'd kill for me."
"Yes, you would. Quit lying to yourself. You'd kill on that stuff, Clark. When you're hopped up on it, you'd kill in a heartbeat to get another hit."
"I..." Clark wants to deny it, but he can't. He tries another line of argument. "But that wasn't me, Lex. It was--"
"You can be controlled, damn it!" Lex sounds truly frantic now. "If I can do it, someone else can too. Anyone could use you. And with your abilities, you're a formidable opponent. You could take over the world, Clark."
"I would never--"
"You don't know that. Neither do I." Lex sounds like the words are being dragged out of him, like he's saying them almost against his will. "The truth is, you can't be left free, Clark. You're just like the other freaks. You're dangerous."
Clark looks at Lex's wide, horrified eyes, and something dies a little, deep inside him, as he realizes he was right earlier. Lex might love him, in a weird, mixed-up, Lex Luthorian way, but that love is tempered very strongly by fear.
Lex is afraid of him. Lex will always be afraid of him.
And maybe, just maybe... Lex is right . Lex ought to be afraid of him.
Maybe everyone should be.
An old, half-forgotten phrase runs through his head. You will be a god among men. They are a flawed race. Rule them with strength, my son.
He has no intention of ruling anybody. But he knows it's possible that the AI that calls itself Jor-El might brainwash him again. Or a human might discover his susceptibility to red K, and use it to control him. Someone might use a shiny necklace to hypnotize him, or magic to enslave him, or...
Lex, he thinks grimly, has a very good point. Even though he only wants to help people with his abilities, there's really no denying that he can be very, very dangerous. Instead of saving the world, he could destroy it.
The thought depresses him. He can tell Lex has just about convinced himself that he needs to lock Clark into one of his labs, so he thinks there's nothing to be gained by keeping secrets at this stage.
And maybe if he's honest with Lex, maybe if he lays all his cards on the table, Lex might trust him a little more. Or maybe not. But regardless, Clark figures he doesn't have anything left to lose.
"I'm not a meteor freak, Lex," he says at last. "I'm an alien."
Read Chapter 9 here.